Thursday Night

I'm on a frickin Frasier marathon. This is what my life has come down to. Actually, I forgot how funny this show is. Anyway, I'm finally getting into the swing of this deployment. No, it's not getting easier its just getting...well I'm dealing. Going to bed alone sucks and then again...I love having the whole bed to myself...not every night though.

Oh how sad...on an even sadder note, Peyton starts 6th grade (middle school) on the 15th. I just can't believe he's in middle school. We went this past Monday and toured the school. Peyton, Xander and I found every classroom (a couple of times). We figured out a system for remembering his locker combination. It was funny standing in front of my son's locker and trying to remember just how to make the darn thing work...it's been a couple years. I remembered. It's so strange to start this phase of his life. I think of all the things that could go wrong and how he's my little boy and all the what if's. Then I just read this devotional the other night talking about not worrying about things cause God's got it all under control. Well, there you go. I realize it's another year in school and kids enter middle school almost everyday...it's normal, but it's not my baby that has to start it for the first time! He'll be fine and so will I. We talked about it and without letting him know, I'm more nervous for him than he is. That's probably a good thing.

It seems Xander enters a new phase in life weekly. I forgot how quickly they change when they are this little. One minute he can only lay on his belly, the next he's rolling over. I'll put him in his little chair thing and he would just sit in it, now he's curious in all the little toys around him. He's actually playing with them. He's grabbing toys with purpose rather than accidentally grabbing ahold. I think right now I love hearing him discover his voice the most. It's funny to watch him make a new sound and surprise himself with that sound. We are so lucky...this kiddo smiles ALL the time. You just have to look at him and he smiles. Strangers will walk up to him and he makes their hearts melt by smiling at them. Such a happy, chill child.

I can't wait for David to come home and to experience all of this with me. Speaking of me...I've been studying my butt off for the past two and a half months for my RN boards. I'm scared to even talk about it, but I have put more effort into studying this time than in the past. I have to say I feel a bit more confident...not so much that I won't continue to study until that testing date arrives but...definitely feel different. I really want to start working again. I have sooo enjoyed this time with my boys, but for me personally, I wanna work. I want a career. I feel like my life has been on hold for too long. Homemakers are amazing women and I envy how they make it all work in their households, I am not one of them. I'm amazing in other areas :-) Haha!

Well, that's it...that's all I got. David, if you read this...I love you with all my heart. I miss you more than words can even begin to express. You take care of yourself and know that I cannot wait until you're in my arms in December.